Temptations

In life, there is always the temptation to do the things that you’re not supposed to. The flaw of humanity; it is fundamental in your psychological makeup to go against the music, defiance. The question is, should we succumb? Do we live by the rules which govern modern society or do we live by rules of our own?

I personally have little to no regard to societal rules, called me an anarchist if you want, but there are just some things I will not acknowledge. I live by my own set of rules, principles. The question is for how long one can remain as such. Immovable, incorruptible. On a cheesy aspect, the concept is simple, you either die a hero – holding on to what you believe in – or you live long enough to see yourself become the villain. Up till today, immovable and incorruptible is the way life is lead. Peer pressure becomes nothing more than a concept, a misconstrued belief. I’ve crossed over to the dark side and waltzed my way back.

Rule No. 1: Never apologize, simply acknowledge your mistakes.

Of recent occurrences

Been off to UiTM Shah Alam for the Vice-Chancellor’s Cup debate, can’t say the team did so well, on a more personal level, I came off with a total of 368 speaker points, which places me at 16 from a list of over a hundred debaters, not bad for a first time. But performance definitely did not meet the expected outcome.

Will definitely miss Alex Hakim, Sarah Yasmin, and Syam…

Looking forward to the coming semester; legal studies and debate.

Incorruptible and Immovable…

Of Dreams and Reality

What is real?

Is it real when you feel it brush against your skin?

Is it real when you smell its sweet scent as it approaches?

Is it real when you hear its tender voice calling out for you?

Is it real when you taste its sweetness with your tongue?

Is it real when you see its horrifying beauty with your own eyes?

So is it ever just another dream?

You see them vividly, its scent significantly magnified, the voices in which you hear pierce straight to your soul making your very being shiver, the buds in which you taste become more competent and every single grain has its own distinct taste making one different from the other, everything you touch its texture forever imprinted in your mind. The emotion in which one feels as one dreams is magnified to the extent where it brinks on the extreme… the fear, the pain, the joy, the pleasure, the anxiety…

So how does one tell which is real? The lives we live when we wake or the ones we live after we tuck ourselves in at night… Consider if the latter is that which is real, consider for once that the lives we live as we walk “awake” is a sham. What if dreams are indeed real and that reality is yet another dream. If life is yet another play, you would be in the same boring play – in which the case would be if we believe the life in which we lead is the one during our “waking” moments – a life with absolutes, a life with constants.

But if the opposite were true, if say the dreaming is reality and that if reality are merely constructions of our minds in which we return to, if that is the case, the number of plays we could be in are endless, we are ourselves and at the same time we are everything we could ever wish to be. The possibilities are limitless. A life of uncertainty, excitement, a life of extravagance.

At the end of every long day filled with excitement and possibilities, we are to retire, in which we dream. We dream of a life in which it is monotonous, we dream of ourselves in which we are awake and we lead lives, and this life we lead change at a pace so slow it takes a lifetime. A life with absolutes, a life with constants. We dream of the lives we lead, a life in which we are “awake”. Such dreams we need to keep our sanity – a place in which we are certain of whom we are and of who we are supposed to be – a place of comfort to which we return to after a long day of excitement and uncertainty. A place for us to recuperate and prepare ourselves for yet another day of uncertainty.

“People think dreams aren’t real because they aren’t made of matter, of particles. Dreams ARE real, but they are made of view points, of images, of memories and puns and lost hopes…”

~Neil Gaiman, The Absolute Sandman Volume 1~

What if?

To Morpheus, Onieros, The Prince of Stories, The Dream King, The Sandman.

For your pleasure…

~Semper Fi~

Of Letting Go and Moving On

You humans simply savour creating bonds of all sorts of relationships as you progress in life. In parallel you also continue to sever the bonds that you once formed. So for those of you humans with mad observation skills, you would by now have realised as how both the acts above that simultaneously occur are both contradictory of one another. With sheer logic – provided of course you have successfully managed to ascend to a higher plane and managed to acquire skills to advance logic (by which you are able to tell that 2 + 2 = more than 2) – you should manage to come to the conclusion to which the effects towards a person are also contradictory. How an act from the above would make one considerable elated the other would in turn make one considerably poignant – as to which makes one feel which I dare not hypothesize – so what an observer would casually wonder as to why you humans choose to religiously continue such a stale circle of events, and this observer believes that he has indeed come to a conclusion as to why you dimwits simply continue going round your stale roundabout.

You humans have this unnerving desire to feel pain… you want to be hurt… you want to suffer… that deep down under the smiles you plaster over your plasticized faces you want to simply cry and feel helpless… you need to feel weak… you need to feel the insignificance of your existence… you need to fall… it helps remind you of who you are…. Who you were… and who you’re going to be… feeling insignificant makes you feel at ease… it takes off the burden of which the whole world depends on you waking up the next morning… no matter how much you desire acknowledgement and power… deep down you will always want to hide and stay in your own hole minding your own business… living life one step at a time… utterly insignificant in the Divine Plan…

And as to why you form bonds… you form them to secretly savour breaking them at the end of the day… to savour the pain… and the feeling of helplessness… You do not want to let go… you do not want to move on… it hurts you… but deep down… you love every moment of it…

 

Something to ponder upon

“Dear Gladys, I really don’t think it is quite right,” said the Duchess feebly unbuttoning a rather soiled kid glove.

“Nothing interesting ever is,” said Lady Windermere

Lord Arthur Savile’s Crime – Oscar Wilde, 1854 – 1900

Yes I am aware that I read awesome stuff

Yet another advice for those who walk this walk to death... if you were to buy new galsses be careful of the frame you choose... cause when i put my new one on... it gave me one hell of a headache...

The Old

The New

And of other awesome things that has happened

and this is for you... and yes I mean YOU!!!

No I've not been diagnosed with cancer or anything terminal... Maybe I'm just nice... Nahhhh :P

~Semper Fi~

Of Endings

Everything good must come to an end

Endings...

Another in life’s long list of constants…

We face em on a regular daily basis… we grew up with endings happening all over the place… we have become so used to it we no longer notice them happening… we barely notice this important pivots in life… so much so we completely fail to comprehend its importance and how much it affects on life… We watch em in movies… we read them in novels (regardless how bad the novel is)… we hear of them in fairy tales and such…

So why does one need an ending???

An ending – as the very essence of the word indicates – provides one with closure, it –lacking any other word fit to describe it – marks an end to a certain aspect in ones life… An optimist would say it marks a new beginning in ones life but then again who has ever actually listened to one of those before… But just because something ends it doesn’t necessarily mean that it has a pessimistic connotation over the matter at hand…

Picture a journey with no end… why even bother continuing the journey if it was to never end? Why not just stop and enjoy what one has and just settle down? The very reason to which would drive one to take the choice of settling down is for one to enjoy and savor what one has worked for ones lifetime before one kicks the bucket… Endings give the story a meaning… the journey on which one has traversed gives one satisfaction upon ones arrival at ones destination… and most importantly death gives meaning to life… so for those of you who dream of immortality, I say screw it and just enjoy life as you wait for it to come to an end… and to those optimists who say endings mark a new beginning, I dare say they quite enjoy the little endings they go through in life in which one can further postulate they look forward to dying… now that doesn’t sound very optimistic now does it???

Life Without Death is Meaningless

I posed a question to two different “test subjects” (other people would call them friends… god knows why they do such atrocious things) I asked what were you to do if left in a situation in which nobody gets out of it alive.

Test subject A replied “I’d just say thank goodness I had a wonderful life”

Test subject B replied “I’d stop wherever I am and not move forward the slightest bit”

Obviously the person to date here would be test subject A… one learns to embrace death has learned how to live ones life… Test Subject B on the other hand suffers from a complex in which one is never satisfied with what has happened and constantly asks to oneself what if I did this and that differently… Death gives life meaning and from that we postulate that for one to properly live one must die… another in life’s long list of irony…

The question of dating these test subjects I mentioned is completely immaterial to the grander scheme of things… exposing their identity would be a breach of an unsigned contract… and as to commenting on their gender would be highly unprofessional and sexist of me… sides you can never be too sure these days… In simpler and politically incorrect terms I’m just being an ass simply because I can… :P

~SEMPER FI~